Stephanie (stephanieruth) wrote in singlegodlywmn,

Hello From Your Long-lost Mod...

... Yeah so I haven't been on livejournal really now for about 8-9 mmonths or something close to that... just due to personal issues and trials in my life, I've been too drained and at one point just felt like I had lost my ability to write and to express myself through writing.

I'm thankful for my amazing co-maintainer, It looks like she took care of all the requests for membership while I was away, which is a blessing.

Anyways, If there are people who haven't met me yet, I'd just like to introduce myself - I'm Stephanie, your moderator.

It seems like we all stray from the path less chosen at one (or two, or three...) point(s) in our life... and some stray farther than others. I have been walking far, far away from the Lord's path for too long.

Allthough I am technically not single, I feel like I am. I got into a relationship with an unbeliever. Never have I felt so alone, even though I do have a boyfriend that is here for me.

I have come to realize that when you are with an unbeliever, it dosen't matter how "good" of a person they are or how well they treat you... If you do not believe in the Lord and you do not believe in the Bible as God's guide to how we are supposed to live our lives, then naturally our belief systems are completely opposite. I believe that in this day and age, any Biblical concept, moral, or value is completely contradictory to the morals, values, and conceptualizations of the world today - no matter how good of a person or how loving of a person they may be... These are two completely contradictory belief systems: The beliefs of the world, and the beliefs of the Children of God.

I regret getting into this relationship... for many reasons... but it hurts me inside to know I may never have that spiritual bond with my boyfriend (because I can't change him, the decision to follow the Lord is a decision only He can make for himself).

But anyway, I feel single... I feel lonely in my faith and lonely as a person.

I have to be true to myself and admit that I don't believe I have the strength to leave him at this point... but then again the Holy Spirit inside of me is knocking at my door, telling me I am strong in the Lord Jesus, and that I am able to do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

I'm hoping for some advice. I live in a small town, and I don't know a single believer here anymore... so I am reaching out in this community, because I know that all you women have a heart for the Lord.

Please say a prayer for me, because besides the boyfriend and all - I feel extremely far from the Lord for very many other reasons, and the desire of my heart right now is to get back closer to my First Love: God.

This relationship is pretty long-term for me though... I honestly can't imagine ever leaving him - I think what it is going to take is prayer and having faith that the Lord will provide me the strength to do according to His perfect will.

God bless all of you ladies, thank you for enduring my rant, and it's nice to be back and it's nice to meet all the people I haven't met yet =)

God Bless,
Stephanie <3
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